Joy As An Act Of Resistance, Who's In?
Thank you to everyone for the lovely feedback about the new website. It feels good to have something out there that’s a bit more representative of me and different types of photography work I like to do. There’s a big shift happening for me and this has been a really useful place to start. The whole process of working with Hannah has been amazing. She’s brilliant. Although, we have tangent rants a lot. She’s one of those folks who is incredibly encouraging and also just gently nudges you to be a bit braver, to charge the going rate for work instead of giving my time and ideas away...
She’s also helped me to just face the fact I’m more than likely to have ADHD. That’s led me to some massive learning about myself, how my brain works (and doesn’t) and how much of a hard time I can give myself for not progressing ideas for projects that aren’t paid jobs. It’s been really liberating. I had no idea about many of the different facets of how ADHD can affect daily life and my behaviours and awful memory make so much sense. It’s a total confidence booster to figure out you aren’t just a lazy procrastinating forgetful bastard but that your brain just doesn’t work in the linear ways that capitalism wants it to. Power to the divergents and all that.
I’ve had the best time this year. It’s been a wild ride. I’ve been an emotionally overwhelmed wreck a lot of it but trying not to be a total people pleasing doormat has freed up some space in my brain and time to hang out with the folks who’ve been there for the rants and the dances so it’s been fun. I’ve also been working mostly on my own at weddings this year for the first time really. I’ve shot weddings for around a decade and mostly had someone with me for the full days but after restrictions last year changed things, I just ended up mostly flying solo. There’s no decompressing from the lovely intensity of it all on the drives home, belting out bangers in the car with Alix. So I’ve been really conscious of how much I’ve missed that but also I’ve started to explore using film again so it’s been a great learning experience. I genuinely have the best clients, always such generous and lovely folks to hang out with so I’m really lucky.
Thank you to everyone who has been a part of my wild year. I feel like I’m growing exponentially and it’s a wild ride. It feels good to find a little confidence to explore autonomy over myself and the parts of me that I maybe haven’t looked after very well for a long time.
I’ve witnessed the most amazing connections between people through my work and beautiful combinations of different traditions. I know I often bang on about it but it really does just amaze me to see it. I shot my last wedding job of the year and the last covid postponement early in November. What a wonder of a wee team in the face of adversity those folks are. And it’s not just the couples I work with, sometimes it’s witnessing the most amazing family bonds too. I don’t have any living siblings and I find it fascinating to watch how they can come together and support each other in the roughest of circumstances. It’s alchemy to see all the ways folks are there for each other. After that day at work I sat on the sofa with my kid and my dad listening to music till midnight (ooft, wee guy was a riot the next day). My dad has just got into streaming, got all French about Jacques Dutronc, says his lyrics aren’t just words, they’re a philosophy. Good times.
November has been pretty much fighting my body’s deep wish to hibernate. The seasonal affective disorder is a beast this year. I also invented an Amelie inspired flirtation with a recycling bin that I realised was more romantic and enjoyable than my past relationships with actual human men so it’s been a time. Winter is always a bastard and I hate most things about xmas so I’m making sure I make time for those lush friends and folks who make me feel enriched. I’m making time to do the things that make me feel full. Mostly that’s either using the tiny bits of freetime I’ve got to chase (booze-free) debauchery or sometimes it’s gentle art feasts, getting out and about creeping with old film cameras and swearing in the dark with chemicals. I can highly recommend hanging out on the beach in a mad cloak based on a costume from the second worst film of all time and eating crisps with the crows for a life affirming start to yer day.
Anyways, some work things I should be taking about instead of this self indulgent pish…
The Store
All profits from sales on our store for the rest of November will be donated to Refuweegee. If you can, please help us to support local makers and this amazing charity by purchasing some of our tactile beauty.
The Elopement Society
We’ve got some exciting new East Lothian elopement and wee wedding news coming in the new year so get in touch if you might want to elope or have a tiny wedding by the beach/in the woods/with delicious things.
Before all the tantruming billionaires kill social media, we’re also working on some old school lo-fi ways of staying in touch which will also push me to do all the personal work stuff I just bashed out a bit of bravado about. I’m just saying this so that Hannah holds me accountable for it in a couple of months when I’ve forgotten. Also to try to tempt you into joining our mailing list so we can be pen pals.
Our brand new Edinburgh wee wedding package for seafood lovers is a banger (although not in the sausage sense I don’t think) so we’ll be hollering out that very soon too.
What’s the bets it takes me 6 months to actually call the doctor for an ADHD test referral…anyways much love as always, stay nourished and cosy cos it’s rough out there xx
